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- Reese Witherspoon says she is brutally honest with her children about what they are bad at.
- She once told her that her 19-year-old daughter might be bad in basketball.
- The man of Witherspoon seems to be equally honest with her about her weaknesses.
- Experts say that being honest with others – and with yourself – is paying off.
A recent feature in Fast Company, entitled & # 39; A day in the life of Reese Witherspoon & # 39 ;, not only provides insight into the daily routine of the actress and entrepreneur, but also in her feelings about & # 39; brutal honesty & # 39 ;.
Here is Witherspoon, as told to Mary Kaye Schilling: "I feel like I am constantly trying to resist the pressure of the parents who want to make the lives of their children golden and magical at any time! Guess what, children? will be disappointed and uncomfortable at times. "
Witherspoon shares a personal example of how she took the fake gold and the magic from parenthood:
"I remember Ava [her daughter, now 19 years old] crying in bed in the third grade – she was on JV basketball and she was the only boy on the team who did not score. I said: "Aves, maybe you are bad with basketball. & # 39; She thought that was mean. I said: 'mean or true? Because what do you think? Your mother is also bad on basketball. & # 39; "
Brutal honesty also seems to be the MO in Witherspoon's marriage. Witherspoon told Fast Company: "I stopped driving a year ago, my husband [Jim Toth] said, "Babe, you're a terrible driver. Let someone do that for you. & # 39; And it's great, because that's the time I spend now with catching up phone calls or text messages. "
Read more: I asked 4 couples of relationship experts to marry each other to prevent them from fighting, and everyone had the same tip
Witherspoon is not the only parent who has proclaimed the benefits of being honest with their children. At Parenting.com, Janelle Hanchett, author of "I'm just happy to be here: a memoir of renegade mothers", writes that she told her daughter (coincidentally, also called Ava) that she was not good at sports.
Hanchett remembers that he was explaining to Ava: "You're in fifth grade and you read Charles Dickens, that's not normal, but you did it without trying … But we all have things that we DO NOT If we want to become good at those things, we can do that absolutely, but we have to make the people around us twice the effort to reach the right point and even harder if we want to excel. "
Apparently Ava has the drive.
Be honest with yourself about your strengths and weaknesses
Even if you are not brutally honest with others about their shortcomings, being honest with yourself is important. In another Fast Company article, Mike Templeman, founder of Foxtail Marketing, writes: "You should not get bogged down in your weak points that do not lead to a huge success."
If, on the other hand, there are weaknesses that affect your ability to become successful, work on it! To borrow from Templeman & # 39; s example, if you are a charismatic person with great ideas, you may want to speak in public. And if you have the habit of using filler words, you probably have to solve that.
Sometimes the fact that you are aware of your weaknesses can help you to respond to them, instead of ignoring them. (I will refer you to the idea of the fixed versus growth mindset.)
In his book "Barking Up the Wrong Tree", Eric Barker wrote that some of the world's most successful people have gained fame and glory because of their eccentricity – notwithstanding. For example, Michael Phelps has an unusual body type, making him an excellent swimmer, but probably not a great runner.
As Hanchett writes on Parenting.com, it is important to let your children know that they are not the best in everything. "She would not [Hanchett’s daughter] also think that the world should work for her? There is a word for that. It will be lawfully & # 39; called. "
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